Elizabeth Jane

Born 9/16/08 @ 8:15 a.m. the old fashioned way "no drugs". Laurie got up to go to work @ about 5:00 and started to have contractions. She wanted me to go to work and do a few sedations and she would just hang out on the couch and yell at me if something interesting happened. I told her that we could cancel the day, after all we are our own bosses. She would yell about every 5 minutes, "cancel the patients!!!!" Then about a minute later she would say very calmly, "I am okay, just do the sedations and I will wait for you." After a few more conversations like this I knew I would be introuble for the next 50 years if I didn't cancel the day. So I called my sedations cases, called the office girls and told them to have a free day on Laurie. We got in the truck and headed to the hospital. Laurie was so mad because she just knew that they were not going to give her any drugs because she was too far along. My little Toyota will only go so fast. I am sure that Fred Flinstone could beat me in a drag race, but Laurie thought it was a stock car race. We got to the parking lot and it only took us 3 contractions and two vomiting sessions to get to the nursing station. They put us in the closest room that they had and Laurie started acting like a rehab addic on a two week bindg. . . "give me drugs, give me drugs." The Nurse was as patient as a mother of 6 could only be, "We will see." Every kid knows that this sort of answer means no, but to a pregnant drug seeking woman, this answer might as well have been, I will start your morphine drip right away. Laurie was falling for the stall line hook line and sinker. I could tell by my experience in a hospital that she stood as much of a chance of getting drugs as President Monson does of getting back stage passes to an Alice Cooper concert. With every contraction my hand was turning into graded cheese. Finger nail after fingernail embedded into my wrist. After a while I was wanting to start the epideral myself. Well after 25 minutes and 7 more, "I am going to dies" a big gush of something that doesn't resemble water came rushing into the room. I don't know why they call it water anyway, it looks like . . . well I don't want you to loose your lunch, but you get the picture. Then the most amazing thing I have ever seen. They started yelling for a doctor to come in the room. This tall man who called himself doctor walked into the room. He introduced himself and Laurie said, "I don't care who you are, just get this baby out of me." They kept asking quesitons like, "What are we having?" I would say, "50/50 chance it is a girl" They all would laugh, but I thought, why not just get the baby out and look for yourself. Then all of a sudden, on push and the baby started to come out. I really can't describe it at all. It looked as if she was comming out to say hello, but without the, "elbow, elbow, wrist, wrist" wave. It was more of a "sirprise" type of entrance into the world. Before we knew it we are playing zone defence "2 on 3". She is the most precious thing ever, and I can't believe that I am so lucky to have the most beautiful wife, with three healthy kids (one of which minds perfectly . . . I will let you decide which one minds). So, that is my story and I am stick'en to it.

Jeremy